Speedway is too cerebral for me

For years now, I’ve puzzled over the cups at Speedway, the gas station chain with the best Frozen Cokes around. The cups, you see, have a slogan on them.

“Un-RIVALed Refreshment”

Now, I know what it means to be “unrivaled”. It means that they have no rivals. But I did not understand the hyphen or the capitalization. For years, I just assumed that Speedway’s marketing people just had no idea what they were doing.

Until yesterday.

Yesterday, I finally asked them via Facebook (where I am a fan) what the deal was. And they got back to me.

ME: Speedway, can you explain “Un-RIVALed” to me? I know it means that you have no real competition, especially in the area of soft drinks, but I don’t get the use of hyphens and capitalization. What am I missing? Or rather, what am I Mi-SSing?

SW: It doesn’t answer all of your questions but I did find out that it was designed as a play on the fact that we carry both Coke and Pepsi products!

ME: Thanks for getting back to me. I have wondered that for years now. How about doing a customer contest to come up with a new slogan that won’t drive word nerds like me crazy? Winner gets free Speedy Freezes for a year.

SW: That sounds like an awesome promotion to me! I will forward that idea on to our beverage team but there is buzz, that there is already a new slogan in the works, that you should be seeing very soon!

So there we have it. It was a play on words. They took two rivals, Coke and Pepsi, and put them in the same soda fountain. They were using the hyphen and the capitalization to say that it was more than an adjective, it was a past-tense verb!

Boy, do I feel pedestrian!

I am glad to hear that they have a new slogan in the works though. But if it is anything like the last one, it may take me a few more years to decipher its hidden message.

In the mean time, I don’t really care what the cups say, as long as Speedway keeps the Frozen Coke flowing. Or should I say “Floe-ing”?

Get it? Ice? Ice Floe? Frozen Coke? No? Oh well. I’ll just leave it to the professionals, I guess.


One thought on “Speedway is too cerebral for me

  1. When we were in Chicago this weekend I saw a sign that said “You’r going to love our cookies!” And this was a painted sign, affixed to the wall! Did they forget the E, or did they not realize you’r isn’t a real word in the English language? It took all my strength to not have management alerted. (Management was in a bad mood already. I couldn’t make it worse for them.)

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s