4 Ways to Make Time

RelojDespertadorThere aren’t enough hours in the day for all the things that you want to do.

  1. Hire a Substitute – Teacher aren’t the only ones who can get subs, you know. Just find someone who looks more or less like you and pay them to do your job for the day. Even better, see if they are willing to do your job for less than you make. That way, you can take off all the time you want and STILL make money! Just don’t let management find out that you are overpaid and/or not working, since they might just cut out the middleman (you).
  2. Stop Doing Housework – You know what takes less time than vacuuming, doing the dishes, and cleaning the toilet? NOT vacuuming, doing the dishes, and cleaning the toilet. Sure, you’ll live in squalor and there’s always the chance of creditors taking your house away, but every reward has its risks.
  3. Sleep Less – Let’s face it. People waste a third of their lives on sleep. Invest heavily in caffeine, friend, because sleep is one of the hardest addictions to break. Of course, there’s a good chance that after three days without so much as a nap, you’ll be criminally insane. Just channel that insanity into a productive form so you can do the things you want to do, only better.
  4. Abandon Family & Friends – It’s time to go into Hermit Mode. People love spending time with you because you are funny, smart, and attractive, but you need to know when to say no. Sure, you will probably lose friends and anger those who love you most, but that’s okay, right? I mean, you have your all-important time to do whatever it is you wanted to do. That makes it okay, right?

So there you have it. All the time in the world. Do all four things and you’ll be amazed at all the time you were wasting! You won’t even have to try smarter approaches like re-prioritizing!

As always, thanks for spending your precious time reading my blog.

Back to School | It Begins…

Today is the first day of the online course that I spoke of earlier. To save you the click, I’ve enrolled in a free online course offered by the University of Michigan through Coursera entitled “Fantasy and Science Fiction: The Human Mind, Our Modern World“. After reading the course syllabus, I’m pretty excited to get started.

That said, this is also my first full week back at work after taking a week of paternity time to help out with my newest daughter. I’ve forgotten just how busy life can seem when you are getting less sleep. Fortunately, my wife is encouraging me to go back to sleep in the middle of the night when the newest one needs to eat. Unfortunately, I’ve learned that the true difficulty of having two kids doesn’t come from the youngest one (who mostly just sleeps and eats and poops and wakes you up in the middle of the night), but from the oldest one (who is running all over pulling out the toys and things that you just put away probably because you just put things away and she sees that as an affront to her toddler feng shui).

Anyway, now that the time has come to do the online course, I’m wondering if I will be able to give it my all, when I am also trying to give my all to my wife, my family, my work, and my writing (including this blog). I’m a big guy, but I don’t know if I’ll be big enough to divide into that many directions.

This is just a worry I have. I’ve done difficult things before and have come out the stronger for it. I’m probably just quibbling here, but if you think of it, offer up a prayer on my behalf that I’ll be able to take care of my responsibilities and not lose my mind in the process of pursuing my creative outlets.